September 22, 2013


Sejak menjak dua tiga menjak ni
Ramai kawan kawan menjauh. 
Sorang sahabat baik sekarang dah tak ambil port sangat dah
Call tak angkat
Call- tak return call balik dah
Ok fine.

Sorang lebih kepada ngajuk
Puah ngajuk cari aku balik ya
Ok fine.
Perasaan aku jah

Sorang lagi macam tak mengalu alukan kedatangan aku
Jumpa di satu 'tempat' tu
Buat derk jah
Rasa macam tiang batu
Sebesar besar aku ni boleh dia wak derk je
Menitik air mata .
ok fine
Mata rabun.

Bersangka baik ngah des?
- Be strong

September 05, 2013

A new journey begins.


Sorry dear self.
 I am totally ignored my blog after these three month.
and now i'm here.
continue it all.
 writing all these things when - me is free. 

2 September 2013.
The day i came and i stand here with no doubt.
I've made a big decision in my life.
Very risky.
But for sake of my family and myself.
I accepted this challenge.

I'm really passionate at first.
But then, once i walked in to the SPS's building
i felt so afraid, scared for sure and 
having a mixed feeling that i can't express 'em here
feeling like wanna going home.

Some friends text me
 wish luck and do pray for my study here as a new student
*haha 1st year student yang tua. kah kah kah
and tak kurang juga yang tahap menyakitkan hati
wasap, text and fb chat. oh pls.
Pray for me first la then after this nak mengayimm ke ngajing ker.
sila lah. ambik belaka. 
Kucing rimau gajah lembu boleh.silakan.

Some students ask me what i'm going to do after this
And they frequently text me : "teacher pindah sekolah mana?"
I feel like urghhhhhhhh.
Let me calm down first boleh?
Dah la sedih tinggal anak lelaki anak perempuan di situ.
Dok ralit SMS saya lak.
Sedih jiwa perempuan nih

For the first week,
 i feeling like doing nothing.
Back to normal life in campus, 
lying on bed doing 'air liur basi'
lying on bed watching movies
lying on bed melayan perasaan 'homesick'
lying on bed thinking about 'friend's att'
relaks dop? hehe
Lek ah lek ah.

Ok, times flies so fast.
Nobody likes to fail.
I want to succeed in everything I do.
But the thing that i'm really passionate about,
if I fail at those stage, means if i'm not successful,
What do i have?
Would u LAUGH at me?

oh, i couldn't think about this actually.
Wooo, never ever happened after this.

Oh Allah, I know that I will be better here
You puts me here again. 
I know You have your own reasons.
I just need to follow the path.
Allah, guide my ways
I want to be a good daughter to my parent
I want to be a good student to my supervisor
I want to be a nice person and being loved by everyone

Make me strong.
New life begins.

kak ngah
5 Sept. '13